Marriage Equality

Gay Day 6:Today, I am going into finals week and I have spent the day in the school computer lab finishing all of my math homework and writing an outline for my persuasive speech that I have to give on Friday.  My topic is Marriage Equality.  I thought that I would share some of my thoughts about marriage equality in the form of my outline, which needs to be pared down quite a bit but I had a lot of ideas so this is my first draft.  I am going to intro myself as a married mother of 4 (which I am).  I also plan to bring my wife, Melissa, as my visual aid (she's THAT hot).  I will intro her as a lesbian in my PFLAG group but not as my wife since nobody knows I'm gay in my class.  At the end, I will give the big reveal that it is I that is her "partner".By posting this here, my audience is wider and, more importantly, I can have a legitimate gay post without it eating into my dinner and watching TV time.  Without further ado, I give you "Equality in Marriage":Title: Equality in MarriageSpeaker: (Sinnerviewer), outreach coordinator for Parents, Family & Friends of Lesbians and Gays (PFLAG)Specific Purpose: To inform my audience about inequality for gay couples and persuade them to support marriage equality.I. IntroductionAttention-getter: This is Melissa. She is a lesbian and I wanted you to look at her and put a face with the issue of gay rights while I share with you some of the ways that she and her partner are treated as second-class citizens, along with thousands of other gay and lesbian citizens in this country. They are discriminated against based on their sexuality and our bias against them.Establishment of ethos: You may all remember from my last speech that I am a married mother of 4 and a member of Parents, Family and Friends of Lesbians and Gays, a support group for LGBT people and their families and friends. As a patriot of this great nation, treating people as unequal is un-American and I feel it is my duty to share what I have learned about this issue so that we are all informed.Thematic statement: Thousands of gay and lesbian couples are denied over 1400 state and federal rights that their heterosexual counterparts receive automatically with their marriage certificate.(Transition: First, let's talk about legal protections.)I. LegalA. Melissa would be forced to pay estate taxes all on property inherited from her deceased partner. This means that for her to stay in the house that they bought together, she would need to buy her partner?s share by paying the government. A married person automatically inherits all the property of his or her deceased spouse without paying estate taxes. B. Laws protect married seniors from being forced to sell their homes to pay high nursing home bills; gay seniors have no such protection.C. Married couples have the automatic right to visit each other in the hospital and make medical decisions. Same-sex couples can be denied the right to visit a sick or injured loved one in the hospital. Melissa cannot make medical decisions for her partner unless they have hired an attorney to draw up legal documents and be able to produce them at the hospital at the time that a decision needs to be made. In addition, Melissa has no legal right to decide what will happen to her partner's remains (funeral arrangements) if she should die.D. Other protections that are lacking for Melissa: Crime victims recovery benefits, domestic violence protection orders, judicial protections and immunity, and automatic inheritance in the absence of a will.E. Here in Georgia and in many other states, Melissa can be fired from her job for being a lesbian.  She has no legal protection from being fired based on her sexuality.  (Internal summary: As you can see, they are not ?special protections? that are needed, only equal ones.) (Transition: Now that you understand the lack of legal protections, let's talk about some of the benefits that Melissa and her partner do not have that you and your spouse might enjoy.)II. BenefitsA. Married people receive Social Security payments upon the death of a spouse. Despite paying payroll taxes, Melissa and her wife receive no Social Security survivor benefits ? resulting in an average annual income loss of $5,528 upon the death of the partner.B. Married workers are legally entitled to unpaid leave from their jobs to care for an ill spouse. Melissa is not entitled to family leave to care for her partner should she become ill.C. After the death of a worker, most pension plans pay survivor benefits only to a legal spouse of the participant. Melissa would be excluded from such pension benefits despite the fact that she and her partner have 4 children together.D. Many public and private employers provide medical coverage to the spouses of their employees, but most employers (82%) do not provide coverage to the life partners of gay and lesbian employees. Gay and lesbian employees who do receive health coverage for their partners must pay federal income taxes on the value of the insurance where married couples do not.E. Other benefits that gay couples are not entitled to: Public safety officer death benefits, spousal veterans benefits, Social Security, Medicare, joint filing of tax returns, wrongful death benefits for surviving partner and children, joint insurance plans, tax credits including: Child tax credit, Hope and lifetime learning credits, Deferred Compensation for pension and IRAs, Estate and gift tax benefits, Welfare and public assistance(Internal summary: Clearly, the gap between heterosexual married couples and same sex couples is vast when it comes to rewarding people in committed, monogamous relationships.)(Transition: Now that we know about the lack of legal protections and the missing benefits, I want to cover the social stigma that Melissa faces.) III. SocialA. Married couples can hold hands in public places and people view it is a healthy expression of their love towards each other. When Melissa wants to hold the hand of her partner in public, it invites scorn, ridicule and rude comments from people.B. Melissa and her partner face discrimination from people who think that their children would be better off being raised by heterosexual couples. However, recent studies including a long-term one that was started in 1986, show that lesbian mothers have children who do better psychologically, academically and socially. They are far less likely to be abused and they have higher rates of continuing their education beyond high school graduation.C. Melissa and her partner would like to take their children to church to worship. However, the closest church to them that is ?open and affirming? is a 45 minute drive. When Melissa?s partner revealed that she was gay at her previous church, her ?sin? was announced from the pulpit and she was dis-fellowshipped in a public worship service where the church (member of the Southern Baptist Convention) prayed for her physical death.D. ?Partner? has a second-class, "less-than" status than the married terms of ?husband? or ?wife? have. People automatically see Melissa?s partnership as a temporary business arrangement instead of the committed, abiding love that nurtures a family.IV. HealthA. In 2009, a pair of economists at Emory University tied the passage of state bans on same-sex marriage in the US to an increase in the rates of HIV infection. The study linked the passage of same-sex marriage ban in a state to an increase in the annual HIV rate within that state of roughly 4 cases per 100,000 population. Gay people are less healthy in general in states where there are no same-sex partner benefits.B. Several psychological studies have shown that an increase in exposure to negative conversations and media messages about same-sex marriage creates a harmful environment for the LGBT population that may affect their health and well-being.C. One study surveyed more than 1,500 lesbian, gay and bisexual adults across the nation and found that respondents from the 25 states that have outlawed same-sex marriage had the highest reports of "minority stress" ? the chronic social stress that results from minority-group stigmatization. In fact, this past Monday, a religious-based ?family? group paid $7,000 to fly a banner plane over Orlando warning the city of ?Gay Day? at Disney World. These are the types of negative social messages that Melissa and her wife must fight each day to be seen as equal in the eyes of her peers.(Internal summary: In all aspects of Melissa?s life, she has less protection, less benefits, more expenses and more social roadblocks to move past in order to live in a committed, monogamous relationship with the woman that she loves.)(Transition: Now that you know the types of discrimination that she faces, I wanted to get you to ask yourself the following questions:)IV. VisualizationA. Do you think that if Melissa could choose her sexuality, she would choose to have these barriers and stigma in her life as well as the lives of her children?B. If being gay is a choice, when did you make a decision about your sexuality? Were you attracted to both men and women and then one day, opted for one side or the other? Or were you just born the way that you are? And if so, why would that be any different for Melissa?C. Do you think that it is fair to treat fellow Americans in a clearly discriminatory way just because you do not share the same sexual orientation?D. How do you think having Melissa be allowed to marry her partner will negatively impact heterosexual marriage? Would straight people suddenly become gay or stop having children? E. Of the 21 nations that allow same sex marriage, what are the harmful side effects that you have observed that these countries that have suffered as a result of allowing same-sex marriage?F. How would you like for people to vote on your marriage and benefits?G. If marriage is a religious term, then it shouldn?t be used for anyone since our country doesn?t endorse any religion. In fact, nobody should receive a marriage license and everyone should get civil union licenses.H. If you believe ?traditional marriage? in the biblical sense is between one man and one woman, what about the numerous cases in scripture where men who were called ?righteous? by God were polygamists and also had concubines (legitimate prostitutes)? Wouldn?t that be considered ?traditional? marriage and if so, should we legalize and hold as ideal polygamist marriages?I. If marriage is a ?sacred institution? between one man and one woman, why don?t we pass laws banning divorce?J. If marriage is only for couples who can physically reproduce, why don?t we ban people who can?t procreate from marrying, such as elderly and infertile couples?K. If heterosexual marriage is the only suitable family model in which to raise children, we should ban married people with children from divorcing until their youngest child turns 18.L. If the government will not allow same sex couples to marry and deny them the same benefits that heterosexual couples receive, shouldn?t they be exempted from paying the same rate of taxes? After all, less benefits should equal less taxes. Since they must pay the same, shouldn?t they receive the same?M. How does making Melissa's life harder help her children, which many people consider a primary concern when it comes to same sex partnerships?  If we genuinely care about the welfare of the children of gay couples, why do we make it harder and more expensive for them to operate?  That is less money going towards the welfare of the children.N. Would you prefer a gay man marry your daughter or a lesbian woman marry your son? Or should we not just allow them, as U.S. Citizens and adults, to make their own decisions about the style of their family?O. If you have a religious objection to gay marriage, why not just avoid having a gay marriage for yourself and let other people with different beliefs do what they feel is right for them as long as they are not hurting anyone else?  Their marriage should not interfere with your religion or practice thereof.(Internal summary: These are the arguments that people wrestle with on this issue.)(Transition: Now that you can see that none of them are really valid, you can be prepared to become a straight ally.)V. Call to actionSummarize and review taking action: Gay people like Melissa are viewed and treated in a discriminatory manner in this country. She faces legal exposure, she lacks hundreds of benefits, she is excluded from social groups and has a social stigma attached to her sexuality and she is at risk regarding her physical and mental health. Tie to introduction: As previously mentioned, there is a tremendous need for straight allies to speak up for marriage equality and let our legislators know how important it is to eliminate discrimination in this country and speak up for the minority group of gay and lesbian citizens like Melissa.Creative concluding thought: Melissa is my wife.  We were married in a church but nobody recognizes our commitment to each other as they would if one of us was a man.  As you look at her and you look at me, please think about our lives and the lives of our children. I hope that you will never choose to stand in the way of our equality and that you will do whatever you can to help raise us and our family to the same societal stature that you and your spouse now enjoy.

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