Scarlett Letter Quote

.I often think back to when I had just come out and how fragile my state of mind was.  I was so beaten down from years of self-loathing and trying to be straight and feeling frustrated that God would not help me to be heterosexual.  When I did tell my ex, he forbade me to even have conversations with gay people.  I had no support whatsoever from a fellow gay until I decided that it was unreasonable and unfair for him to deny me any support while he enjoyed the full backing of our church and friends.  When they threw me out of church and announced my sin in public and asked the members of my church to only speak to me with the purpose of addressing my sin with me, I was certainly at a weak, low point..I am reading "The Scarlett Letter" (Hawthorne) for my American Lit class.  I came across this quote which greatly ministered to my spirit because it reminded me that where Hester is is also where I am:Strengthened by years of hard and solemn trial, she felt herself no longer so inadequate to cope with Roger Chillingworth (her ex) as on that night, abased by sin, and half maddened by the ignominy that was still new, when they had talked together in the prison-chamber. She had climbed her way, since then, to a higher point. The old man, on the other hand, had brought himself nearer to her level, or perhaps below it, by the revenge which he had stooped for..Trials have a way of growing you as a person.  The things that you could not bear to even think about, let alone actually live through, are easier than you think they will be.  The dread that I had in the simple thought of losing this man's friendship haunted me for years and kept me from living a life that would make me happy.  Now, I can see that my life has gone higher and further than I ever dreamed possible.  I can also see how suffering through those trials has made me a stronger person and able to stand up under it.  Those who felt that they had strength in numbers and behaved despotically towards me will have to bear their own shame for their deeds that took them below any level that I was ever on. .Towanda, Hester Prynne!

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